San Antonio Valley, South Sonoma County, Petaluma, California

"Dog For Sale"

During a recent trip my wife and I were on we drove around the backroads of Lake County. In one small rural town I saw a sign in front of what looked to be a simple two bay volunteer firehouse: "Talking Dog for Sale" it read. Well I needed a break, so I stopped to see what the deal was. I pulled around into the rear area and sitting there next to the hanging hose dryer was a nice looking white Labrador retriever.

"You talk?" I asked. "Yep, name's Dakota" the Lab replies.

Well, after I got over the shock of hearing a dog talk, I asked "So, what's your story?"

"Ah shucks there ain't much to tell. Hey, is that a Cairns 880 Tradition helmet on your rear van seat there?"

"How do you know about that," I asked?

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I'm a firefighter. I got my Red Card when I was a young pup and in no time at all I had my Engine Boss and Crew Boss. The U.S Forest Service heard about me and asked me to do some spy work for them. I would hang around the ICP and with my keen hearing I could hear the Joint I/C's comments about the IAP. Because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping, I could let their superiors know what was really going on with the fire."

"Spending all that time in fire camps really tired me out and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. So, I decided to settle down. I retired from the U.S.F. (3 dog years is 21 Forestry years) and joined a volunteer department. In fact I won first place in number of calls taken two years in a row. Then I met this chocolate Lab and we had a mess of puppies so I got away from the fire service for a while. I sure miss the rewarding work of it though. Why don't you buy me and I'll join your department."

I said "let me see what I can do." I went back in and asked the owner what he wanted for the dog.

"Ten bucks," the guy says.

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff he says. He's just a wan'na be firefighter. He really works the graves here in dispatch as a 911 operator."